A 1% chance

That’s our chances of this being a viable pregnancy after having a scan done today. Our fourth beta was 1009. A gestational sac in the uterus could be seen on the ultrasound, but only just. There is still a chance that it could float into the Fallopian tubes and I’m to go back on Monday to monitor that this doesn’t happen. If it does, I will have laperascopic surgery to remove it. I have been told to stop all meds and that the best possible outcome is that I miscarry naturally. Personally, I’m not holding onto that 1% hope as I won’t allow my heart to be any further shattered. It’s a bust, it’s over. We have to grieve and move on. I’m not sure how yet… But I do have some ideas which I will explore next week. For now, I’m going to cry, probably quite a lot, and I’m also going to be really, really mad.

11 thoughts on “A 1% chance

  1. This is heartbreaking news. I’m so, so sorry. I was just there, I know exactly what you’re going through and it’s so damn hard and so damn unfair. Take care of yourself in the best way possible this weekend and the weeks to come. Hugs.

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  2. Dammit. This is what happened to me and I was hoping wouldn’t happen to you. I know the feeling of wanting to move on. I got a D&C to move it along as the RE said it could take 6 weeks. I hope you can move on quickly.

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  3. I am sorry to hear your news. I certainly shed a few tears on your behalf. No one wants to hear that news. Sending you all the strength you need to get through this time. Xo

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  4. damnit, I am sorry. Life really does suck great big eggs. Cry, mourn and heal; and remember you are a step closer to a baby then you were before.

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  5. Oh, I am sorry to hear this. I, too, received similar 1% chance news a little over a year ago, and all I could think of was, “That means a 99% chance of heartbreak.” It’s the worst kind of news to hear. I wish that this was not the outcome for you, but know that you will get through this (not over, but through). The only thing that helped me was the care and kindness of others, so I’m sending all of that, plus love and peace your way.

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